Let’s just say.. people will never understand me.

As you may probably know or can tell by my latest post, I’ve been away doing my own thing. A lot of it consists of being with my boyfriend, disappointing my family and doing what makes me happy. Everyone has their own goals and dreams but I guess you can say, I like to achieve mine differently. At this certain point in my life, I’ve found someone who I picture myself being with for the rest of my life. I’ve finally decided what I wanted to do with school since I wasn’t really into this community college and majoring into something medical like everyone wished. And as hard as I know it’s gonna be, I’ve decided that I can’t stay home with my family anymore. Ever since I was a little girl, my parents have pushed me into doing things that would just upset me and they would push me into being a person that I’m not. I know they’ve supported me since day 1 but why can’t they just be happy and supportive with the decisions I make? If it makes me happy, why can’t they just do me this extra favor? It frustrates me that my parents and I can never get along and I don’t mean to be selfish but I wanna live my life the way I want to. What’s wrong with that? Now, as for my boyfriend.. supposedly no one in my family likes him. Everyone gets at him for the decisions that I’ve been making and not only does it hurt, but it frustrates me even more. I’ve always wanted to meet a guy that I can show and bring around my family but sadly, that’s just never gonna happen. I mean, I’m thankful that I can at least say his name and let them know that he exists but it sucks that I have to basically keep him out of sight or else something bad might go down. It’s retarded! I’m not turning my back away from my family.. but I just can’t live like this anymore. I needed to get away and ever since then, I’ve been fine. Although it’s been really hard, I’d rather stay with my boyfriend. We want certain things in our lives and we’re doing our best to make it happen. We work together now and I’ve figured that no one will ever understand that. If you can’t except the way I am now, then you’ll never except the way I am later on. It sucks but it is what it is..

#venting  
August 15, 2011 at 12:49am
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